The Man Behind The Books
by Magdelena Sforza
Summary: Shaun is sick of being so lonely. Everyone seems to be happily taken except him. But that changes when he meets a girl he never thought would even phase him. Rated T for potential later themes. Yup, expect a sex scene. Shaun/OC
1. Chapter 1

Shaun stared at the newspaper, sipping his tea. New York had been good to him, he was working in a library, he was living with his best friend/worst enemy Desmond and everything was comfortable. There were no problems, no stress, and most of all, he was having fun for once. He didn't like going out much, he prefered staying in, enjoying a few beers with some friends. Rebecca Crane and Lucy Stillman, two of his best friends from both school and college had moved to New York shortly after he had, and lived just a block away, in an apartment together. His life was perfect, with the exception of one thing. He was lonely. Not lonely for lack of friends, he had plenty of those. Lonely for lack of love. He had yet to meet someone who really aroused his interests, in both meanings. He saw Lucy and Desmond casually date, Rebecca dating that girl, Tara, from college and he felt so... put out. He had yet to even _see_ someone he wanted to know. He tried to avoid thinking about it, but some mornings, he couldn't avoid it.  
He sighed, throwing the paper down as he quickly drained the last of his tea. At least he still had decent tea here. He placed his cup in the sink, staring out the window at the city that had welcomed him and treated him better than he had ever expected. _In most ways at least._ He sighed again, grabbing his brown leather messenger bag and walking quickly to the door. Work should be the only thing on his mind.  
Just as he opened the door to leave, Desmond stumbled from his room in his striped boxers. It had been a long night for him clearly. "Shaun, where are you going so early?" Desmond managed to blurt, using his arm to protect his eyes. "Well they invented this thing Desmond, it's called work. I'm going to try it out now." Shaun rolled his eyes. "This is why you're single, dickhead" and returned to his room. _Ouch..._ that one stung. That made his day just a little worse.

The New York Central Library was just around the corner, a short 4 and a half minute walk for him. To add to his already bad day, it was a Monday, kids ran passed and into him in some sort of hurry to get to the one place that they don't pay attention. After wading through all of them, he reached the steps of the library. "Bloody wankers..." he sighed as he entered the building. At least here he could be safe from all kinds of noise. That is, if you ignore the sound of keyboard clicking and coughing.  
The day passed as any other would, a slow, but steady flow of people of all ages, keeping quiet, sitting and reading, or checking out books. No one of interest as always. Even when he had time to glance at the people at the counter, no one caught his eye. None of them gave him that squirm in his stomach, that nauseous feeling of excitement and adoration. Not even a little bit. He glanced at the clock, only two more hours. The flow of people slowed further, and the last two hours were filled with tea and reading. And the second the clock hit 6, he ran out the door, eager to get home. Even though he wasn't sure why. Maybe being sad is easier in a place you know like the back of your hand.  
As he walked in, Desmond was walking towards the door. "Hey, Shaun, sorry about this morning. Bit of a hangover." he laughed a little, fixing his coller. "It's fine, you're working tonight I assume?" "Yup! So bring whatever company you want!" Desmond grinned, hoping the best for his dear friend. "Yeah, like that's gonna happen" he ran his hand through his hair, sighing. "Is everything okay Shaun?" he was concerned, he knew Shaun was lonely, but didn't really notice _how _lonely. "Yeah, just rainbows and farts, now go away." Shaun tried to blow everything off, seem happy for Desmonds' sake, knowing it would only work for a while. He was sceptical, but Desmond couldn't stay, he patted Shauns shoulder and proceeded to leave their apartment.  
Letting out another sigh, Shaun dropped his bag and made his way to the bathroom. He was in dire need of a shower. Spending your day in an excessively warm library in a shirt and sweater was not easy. He turned on the shower, and stripped, dumping his clothes in the hamper. Before stepping into the shower, he took a good look at himself. He was a broad man, strong chest and shoulders, not quite a six-pack but toned. His jaw was soft, and donned short stubble. His eyes were a chocolatey brown, and his hair constantly maintained a messy, yet intelligent, tussle. His eyes moved down his body. It's not as if he wasn't well endowed. Maybe there was something wrong with him. Maybe it was his sarcasm that detered any potential dates. Even so, if any woman came onto him, he didn't seem to be interested. He sighed for what seemed like the millionth time, and took off his glasses. Rubbing the bridge of his nose, he got into the shower.

Without looking, he grabbed the nearest shower gel, and began to scrub his chest. Then the smell hit him. This was Desmonds "night-out" shower gel. The one that smelled like generic cologne. He made a soft growl and grabbed the next one, the soft, clean scented one he normally used. He scrubbed his chest again, letting his mind wander, this time to Desmond. Why was it Desmond could meet women so easily? Maybe he was too picky. He tried to picture a woman he found attractive, and drew a blank. He couldn't figure it out. He let the water run over his face as he scrubbed his arms. At least here he could be alone with his thoughts about everything, and not have Desmond ask what was wrong. He could hardly say "I can't find a woman". He grabbed his shampoo, and spurted it out onto his hand, placing the bottle back, he stopped. What if Desmond could help him? He let out a snort. Was he really so desperate? He scrubbed the shampoo into his hair, feeling the residue run down his back. It made him shiver. He rinsed it out, still pondering his lack of ability to find another human appealing.

Turning off the shower, he stepped out, wrapping a towel around his waist. He felt his stomach rumble. He smirked, realizing eating had completely slipped his mind. He walked out of the bathroom, to the kitchen. He peered into the fridge, realizing how much effort there seemed to be in cooking. Closing the fridge door, he spotted a pizzaria take out menu. Pepperoni and meatball pizza sounded perfect right now. He quickly made his order, then retreated to his bedroom. It was filled with books, DVDs and small ornaments of meaning. He grabbed his lounge clothes from the wardrobe, and let the towel fall. He spotted himself again. His lips pursed together. _Maybe there's something really wrong with me?_ He shook his head, and slipped on the loose pants and cotton shirt and his glasses. If he didn't have to deal with people, he'd be in boxers.  
He walked out into the living room, flicking on the television and revisiting the fridge. He pulled out a beer and flopped onto the couch. Some generic reality tv show was on.  
He snorted, "The stupidity you see on television nowadays, this may as well be a poster titled "How to be a slut"." he laughed to himself, sipping his beer. He continued watching the mindless dribble, until he heard a knock at the door. Grabbing his wallet, he answered, paid the delivery guy, and went back to the couch. He grabbed a slice of pizza, flicking through channels as he ate. Eventually settling on a movie, he finished the majority of the pizza, leaving two slices in the box for Desmond.  
He glanced at the clock. Only 9 O' Clock. A book and some tea. Why not, it's not like he had anything else to be doing. He went to his room, and stripped to his boxers. He chose a random book he couldn't remember reading and began to skim the pages, reading them but not really taking in the words. He sat there until what felt like the early morning hours. He laid down and looked at the clock, only 11.30. He groaned and laid back, taking off his glasses and staring at the ceiling.  
_Tomorrow will be better_ he told himself.


	2. Chapter 2

The ringing sounded like it had been magnified against his ear drums. He hit the alarm clock, hoping it wasn't broken as he dragged himself out of bed, putting on his glasses. He pulled on some black trousers and shoes. He quickly sprayed some deodrant before pulling on a white shirt. He grabbed his favourite sweater, a plain grey one, and walking to the kitchen, flicking the switch on the kettle. He began buttoning his shirt as it boiled, and grabbed some bread. He put it into the toaster quickly and pulled on his sweater, rolling up the sleeves. He noticed the pizza box was now empty. He made himself tea, grabbed the paper from the mat and settled at the table. He felt better today, almost optimistic. He heard his toast pop, and nibbled it as he continued to read the paper. There was no stirring from Desmonds room, so he assumed he wouldn't be graced with a view of his underwear choice this morning. Grabbing his bag, he walked out the door. He was a little early, so he managed to avoid the rush of children.

When he reached the library, he was far more cheerful than he had been yesterday, and it made him almost happy to be here, despite the slow moving day. After a few hours of soft and quiet whispers while arranging the filing cabinet, his peace was interrupted by the buzz of loud headphones. He looked up from his archives and he stopped. A girl had just walked in. But she was unlike any girl he had ever laid eyes upon. Her hair was long, black, and fell in waves. A patch of grey hung in her eyes in such a way that he could not understand believe was not putting her in pain. It should be moved. He wanted it to be moved. All it did was obstruct his view of her perfect skin. She looked like a walking porcelain doll, she was pale with soft pink cheeks and dark pink lips that seemed to have a natural pout. Her eyes were big and dark brown, they were rimmed in black eye liner, with a soft grey on her eyelids. As she walked around, he took in her shapely, hourglass figure, which was covered by a hooded felt jacket, that was buttoned at the front, a black clingy skirt, thin grey tights and black high boots. She seemed short. She walked to a shelf. Classic literature. _Perfect. _

He slipped out from the counter, and strolled in her general direction. It wasn't often he left his perch for someone. He slipped up next to her quietly, hearing the buzz of her music again. He cleared his throat, and saw her eyes slip to him. Up close, he saw subtle features. Freckles were sprinkled over her nose and the top of her cheeks and she had cute dimples. There was a small stud on the lower right side of her lip that had another ball showing just above it. His hands were behind his back, one hand clasping his forearm, his throat seemed dry, and as she pulled out her headphones, he felt his heart stop. Their eyes met and he felt it. What he was looking for. _That nauseous feeling of excitement and adoration_. "Yes?" She said, smiling. Dear God, it was so cute. "Uhm, can I help you..find..anything?" he breathed the last few words, finding all the air to have escaped him. "Uhm..." the sound buzzed in his ears "well, I'm looking for something in particular, but I haven't been able to find it anywhere else..." She let the sentence off and glanced up at him with doe-like eyes. His breath caught again. "A-and what is that?" he tried to keep calm. ""The Legend of Sleepy Hollow" by Irving Washington". The words seemed to purr from her lips. His eyes were stuck on them. He cleared his throat again. "Uh, yes, right here" he reached to one of the higher shelves, and pulled it down, handing it to her delicately, as if the movement could break her delicate hands. "Thanks" her smile widened and her eyes lit up. _Wow, she's really happy to be able to read this..._ "Is it okay if I stay here to read for a while?", she smiled again, her eyes seeking his. "Y-yes, yes of course" he smiled and she walked to a small table with just one chair.  
He returned to his space, trying to figure out what had just happened. His explaination was simple. He had met the girl he had always wanted to meet. And he spent the majority of the 5 seconds they were together gaping like a fish out of water. And for the remainder of her time there, he didn't take his eyes off of her. He couldn't.  
Her hair was draped over her shoulder and she made little gestures. And he felt they were only for him. The little nibble of her lip, the little smile that crossed her lips when she enjoyed something in her book, the little sweep of her hair from her eyes...before he knew it, it was 6. He looked around, she too was rising to leave. He grabbed his bag, took a breath and walked out the door, hoping she'd talk to him. Before he left the counter, he was interupted. "Excuse me? Could I take this out please?" He looked up from his tidying, and straight into her eyes. "Uhm, yes, yes of course". As she handed him the book, their fingers grazed, and Shaun felt shocks run through him. He stamped the book, still trying to regain his breath. As he handed it back to her, he saw that cute smile, the one she had when she was reading. He couldn't help but smile back.  
He felt butterflies in his stomach as he left his space. He felt her eyes on the back of his head as he walked out of the building, and he hoped he would feel them all the way home. Just as he got to his door, he looked around, and saw her at the corner. She looked at him once more, still smiling, and waved. He waved back and couldn't help himself from smiling like a fool as he got into the building. And that smiled stayed on his lips even as he entered his apartment.

"What are you so happy about?" He was greeted by Desmonds chirpy voice. "That I was away from you all day" Shaun smirked, knowing his sarcasm was far more toned down than normal. "You wound me with your cruel, cruel words!" Desmond laughed, "You seem less bitchy than normal, something happen?" Shaun shrugged, knowing there was a telltale blush on his face. "Just had a good day" "Yeah, I know what that means" Desmond smirked, slapping Shaun on the back. "Hey, I'm off for the night, thinking of heading out with Lucy, Becca and Tara, want to join?" Shaun thought for a second. _Maybe I'll see her... _"Sure, when?" "In about an hour, we're going for pizza and then for a few drinks" "Sounds alright. I'll jump in the shower so."  
Walking steadily passed Desmond to his own room, he dropped his bag and leaned against the wall. This day had been so much to take in, and now, just thinking about leaving the house made him think immediately of whether or not he'd see her again. He looked at his clothes, it was his favourite outfit. She seemed to like it. Wait, what was he thinking? Why did he assume she liked it? All she did was smile. Oh, and what a smile it was... he shook his head. He needed to focus on being alert tonight, not letting himself think about her. He couldn't really let anyone know about this yet. As far as they knew he was a cold, heartless British bastard that didn't care for love. If they knew...He decided to keep the same clothes, they were relatively clean, right? He took off his shoes and socks, grabbed a towel and scooted to the bathroom. He had an hour. That gave him plenty time to be sure he looked okay...wait, he was concerned about looking okay for someone he didn't even know if he would see? He shook his head, taking off his clothes and folding them. He looked at himself again. Would she like him? He shook his head, pursing his lips at the very idea of it, as he entered the shower.  
He couldn't imagine she would, but every bit of him hoped she did. He washed slowly this time, wanting to be sure he reeked of clenliness. She seemed the type to enjoy it. He realized how much she was on his mind. He remembered every tiny detail about her. Especially her sweet little smile. The way her cheeks rose and went that cute pink shade. Everything about her was just so...perfect. Especially her shape. The way her body curved like an hourglass, how it moved when she walked, with the sway of hips...he noticed that he really had found the girl who aroused his interests in more than one way. He smirked, imagining her movement, how she looked when she was concentrating, all her cute twitches. He shampood his hair, massaging his scalp slowly. What would it be like if she were to do this for him? To press herself against his back, stand on her toes and massage his scalp. And let her hands trail down his neck, his shoulders, his back...he shivered thinking about it. He noticed himself grow firmer. His hand slid down his stomach, about to get rid of it. But, he was disturbed by a opounding on the door. "Shaun! Hurry your British ass up or we'll be late!" "I can't when you're right outside the door Desmond!" "Whatever dickhead, move it along!" "Fine!" he heard Desmonds footsteps retreating from the door. "Wanker..." he whispered, getting out of the shower. He sighed, realizing he had to get rid of his...stiffness.

He quickly put on his clothes, trying to hide his bulge. Confident it wasn't obvious, he slipped on his glasses and gave a quick look at himself. _I hope I see her..._ He let out a breath. He opened the door, almost walking right into Desmond. "Yes, yes I know, we're late princess, just let me grab my wallet." "No we're not, I only said that 'cause I needed a shower myself" he sniggered as he walked by Shaun, who let out another sigh. He looked at the clock, realizing he had half an hour. _Tea. _Tea always helps. He flicked the switch on the kettle, and set out his favourite cup. It was a plain white cup with a little row of flowers at the top. It had been a present from his grand mother when he was a child and remained his favourite ever since.

He stared out the window, watching the sun go down. _Where is she now..._he couldn't stop himself from wondering. She was probably cuddled up to some guy right now, her legs over his, watching television. He felt sick just thinking about it. What if she lived alone? What would she be doing? Reading? Watching a movie? Napping? Showering? He felt the same bulge grow once again, imagining the water running over her pale, perfect skin, her hair sticking to her back, her hands moving over her body, the shower gel slipping over her curves. He bit his lip, he needed to stop himself. He realized the kettle had boiled, he shook his head and prepared his tea.  
He felt like it was going to be a long night.


	3. Chapter 3

He and Desmond arrived at Lucy's place at 7.10, being late only for Desmonds vanity. Not that it was any major problem given that the girls were only just ready themselves. The pizza place wasn't far, but for Shaun, it was a dreadful 5 minute walk as a 5th wheel. He kept an eye out for that girl, his heart beat speeding up everytime he saw any length of black hair. Unfortunately, he was wrong every time. As they walked into the pizza place, he realized how thankful he should be. He couldn't risk even his friends knowing that he had developed any feeling that wasn't negative. He knew they'd hold it against him. But he still couldn't take his mind off of her. He didn't even notice where they were until they were sitting in the pizzaria. "So, what do you think Shaun?" he heard Taras voice out of the blue. "Hmm, of what?" he felt bad for not paying attention but surely that wasn't his fault. "About going on holiday next month? All of us?" She laughed, gaining a smirk from Rebecca. "Uh, yeah, why not" he didn't even feel like discussing it. He was starting to regret having left the house at all.

"So-" Lucy was interupted by the waitress bringing their pizza. He was clearly over doing the pizza lately. He nibbled a slice, waiting for Lucy to continue her statement. Anything if it meant keeping her mind off of that girl. "So, what were you about to say Luce?" Rebecca asked, taking a bite of her pizza, keeping her eyes on Tara across the table. He was amazed at how dedicated they were. It was so clear they were in love. He wondered what it would be like, to know that feeling was returned. "Well, we wanted to announce" a bright red crossed Lucy's cheeks. "Well, we're official. It's not just casual anymore" Desmond smiled at her across the table. Great. Now he really was the only one alone. "So we were thinking of maybe, getting a place together." They smiled at each other again. Shaun began to eat faster. Now he had to concern himself with his own place. He could keep the same place. It wasn't too much more expensive and all his stuff was there. "Don't worry Shaun, I'll be the one moving out!" Desmond laughed. Shaun smirked, "Thank you for granting me my one and only dream Desmond, although I hope you're capable of dealing with this great burden Lucy". He took another bite of pizza as Desmond gave him a light punch in the shoulder.  
The next half hour was spent discussing new ideas for the so popular holiday next month. Shaun kept quiet. He had never felt so alone. As they made their way to the bar, he found his mind wandering to the idea of that girl being with him, living with him. She seemed like a quiet person, someone he'd love to live with. Even just as a friend. He'd love to just be around he knew it, they were in the bar, sitting at a table, having just ordered drinks. He didn't even know what he'd ordered. When a beer was placed in front of him, he figured it out. He took a sip, trying to stay tuned into the conversation. Facing the door, he looked around, still hoping to see her. Again, he was disappointed.  
He tuned into the conversation, dully looking around every so often, nodding when appropriate and trying not to barge out the door. As he turned back into the sound of Lucy making holiday suggestions, the door opened. And his jaw dropped. Dressed in the same clothes, pushing her hair back from her face, the girl from the library walked in, accompanied by another girl. He didn't even take the time to look at her friend, he couldn't take his eyes from her. Her friend walked ahead, as she took off her jacket and walked to the bar, standing on her toes to order. His eyes travelled from her boots, up her legs, which were now bare, her behind, which was covered by her skirt and now on display thanks to the jacket being removed, and which Shaun couldn't help but enjoy, up her back, which was covered by a loose top that was slit a number of times up the back, and got to her hair. It was in long waves, with a curl next to her fringe. Her pout seemed more obvious than before. She turned, her drinks in her hand.

His eyes went back to her legs for a second. He spotted some long silver scars on her thighs. He couldn't help but wonder. He looked back to her face, to see her eyes pointed down. But she looked up, and there was that connection again. That spark that almost made his jaw drop. And then there was that smile that finished that job. He smiled back, or at least tried. His eyes followed her to her seat, and when she reached her seat, she turned to look at him again, that cute smile still on her lips, her cheeks bright red. "Shaun!" He felt Desmond elbow him. "Hmm?" "Are you even paying attention, or were you too busy checking out that chick with the funky hair?" he laughed. "Uh, no" he cleared his throat, knowing his cheeks were now red. "I uh, I thought I knew her from work" "Sure, that explains the dropped jaw" Rebecca smirked. "Aww, Shaun's in love!" Tara squealed. She didn't hold alcohol well. "Of course I'm not, I don't even know the girl!" he tried to laugh, but the butterflies in his stomach made this a futile effort. "Well it certainly seems like you want to" Lucy smirked, he glared, knowing she could read him like a book. "Nonsense, I just thought she looked familiar." He took a sip of his beer, trying to seem nonchalant. "Sure, and pigs fly" Desmond smirked, realizing how embarrassed his friend was. The conversation returned to the infamous holiday. Shaun quietly excused himself to go to the bathroom. Any effort to remove himself was a positive one. On his way, he tried to look at her. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her stare, her mouth curved into that same smile again. He continued to the bathroom, realizing it was probably for other reasons. He went into a stall and sat down. Staring at his lap, he took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. He couldn't deal with them knowing. Even their jesting had caught him off guard. He had to hide it better. And what must she think, realizing he was staring at her like that. He got up, shaking his head and flushing the toilet out of habit.

This was certainly an interesting night.


	4. Chapter 4

Shaun took a deep breath as he walked out of the bathroom. Knowing that their eyes would meet again and that the entire world around him would shake and stutter ofor thiose few seconds. As he left As he left the short hall, he braced himself. As he opened the door, he collided with someone. "Sorry" he muttered without looking at them. "Shaun, what's going on with you?" Desmond was staring straight at him. "You left in such a hurry". Shaun peeked over his shoulder, seeing her, silent, maybe even listening. "Well, bodily functions do need to be addressed with relative haste Desmond, unless you want it running down your leg." He saw her smile. _Was it because of what I said? _"No, really Shaun, you seem more quiet and more bitchy, come on, what's up?" Desmond looked genuinely concerned, but he knew he couldn't say what he wanted. "Do you talk more when you need a piss, is that why you're concerned?".

Desmond rolled his eyes. "Good to see you're still a dick...". He pushed passed Shaun, who let out a sigh. He noticed the girl was smiling a little, her eyes slipping to him, darting away once she realized he was looking. He noticed he was staring without meaning to. His eyes flew to the floor as he walked back to his seat. _She was probably smiling at Desmond. _Loud laughs were coming from his friends table and upon his arrival back, he saw another beer next to his first, which was only half finished. He took a long drink as he flopped onto the seat. "Take it easy Shaun" Rebecca laughed. He rolled his eyes, "Yes mummy" he grumbled, taking another swig of his drink. She stuck out her tongue at him, then went back to play fighting with Tara. He couldn't stand being so put out. He sighed, trying yo hide his annoyance, upset, hurt, loneliness, everything. He looked up from the table just in time to see the girl leaving with her friend. And to see her purse fall from her jacket. She left without batting an eyelid about it. He slid out of his seat, the alcohol hitting him as he stood. Rebecca was right, he should have slowed down. He was fine aside from that moment, and he picked up the purse, tempted to open it, just to see her name if anything. He walked out the door, trying not to run, as Lucy called after him. He saw her hair before anything. She was alone. He cleared his throat, walking quickly to catch up. He could hear her headphones alreadt. He reached her back and cleared his throat again. "Excuse me..." he tried to speak loudly, but he couldn't. Somehow she had heard him, and turned around, pulling out her headphones.

"Yes?" her voice made his heart melt. "You...uh you dropped this" He stammered, handing the purse to her. _Real cool Shaun..._ "Oh my, thank you so much!" She took it,smiling and flinging her arms around him. Time stopped for him. He forgot how to work his arms for a second, then managed to slip one around her waist to return the hug. Even though it felt like hours, she let go too soon. He felt a wave of sadness, when her arms left his shoulders. "Seriously, you're a life saver" she smiled that smile, his smile. He forgot to talk. "Uh, no problem" he smiled but he wanted to continue talking to her. "I hope you're enjoying that book" he almost whispered. "Yeah! I've been looking for it for years,I only decided to try that library as a guess, lucky eh?" She smiled again, more mysterious this time, as if there were something else behind it. "Anyway, I've to be getting back, see you later Shaun". She knew his name "Wait, how do you know my name?" for the first time without whispering. "I heard you and your friend talking" She laughed, "I sound like a stalker!" He chuckled. "Since you know mine-"  
"Shaun! We thought you'd been kidnapped or something!" Desmonds hand slapped down on his shoulder. The still unnamed girl waved as she walked away. Shaun turned to Desmond, preparing to call him every name under the sun. "So that's what's been bugging you!" Desmond smirked "You've got your eye on that chick!"  
"And if you hadn't so rudely interrupted, she'd be more than |that chick"" Shaun glared. "Well, to make up for it, I'll just say it looks like she's pretty into you." Shaun knew Desmond was just happy for him but he still partially hated him for interrupting them. "Come on, finish off your drink" He started back. Shaun looked over his shoulder, hoping she had come back, though he knew she had no reason to. He followed Desmond inside, knowing every hour he spent would only be with her one his mind.  
How does Desmond do it?

Shaun woke the following morning with a pounding headache. They had stayed at the bar until it closed, and Shaun came home alone, and very, very drunk. Thankfully, he didn't have work today. He tried to rise from him bed, and the pain in his head stopped him. He heard the front door open. "Shaun?" He heard Desmonds voice. Not a good way to wake up. "What do you want Desmond?" he said, lying down and placing his arm over his face. He did not want to know what Desmond had planned. "Want some breakfast?" Desmonds breakfasts had always helped him. "Will it kill me?" Shaun groaned. "Nope, just help with the hang over."  
"Then get to it Ramsay!" he rolled onto his chest. "A shower wouldn't kill you either." Desmond chuckled, closing the door and starting on breakfast Despite the pain, Shaun still saw her in his mind. Everything about her was perfect to hhim. He sighed, pulling himself out of bed and grabbing his glasses, fresh clothes and a towel as he dragged himself to the bathroom. He flicked on the shower, and locked the door, not wanting to see how bad he looked. He thought about the previous night as he washed, how he had been so hopeful, how he had been so lucky to see her, even luckier to _talk_ to her. And he still didn't even know her name...he took a deep breath and the smell of breakfast hit his nostrils. For a bartender, he could definitely cook. He got out, dried as quickly as he could and dressed. He began brushing his teeth, thinking over his conversation with her for the millionth time. He had only managed because of "dutch courage". Maybe he wasn't even remembering it right. He left the bathroom, head still pounding, He got to the table, before him sat bacon, eggs and tea. He was shocked. Desmond had done so much for him. He thanked the other man who was sipping coffee with his own breakfast. "So, Shaun, I wanted to talk to you about something". He sounded nervous. _The girl. _"I know it's a big change that Lucy and I will be living together, and I won't be your problem anymore. But I think, judging from last night, it could be a great opportunity for you to find someone. Like that girl." he slipped the last bit in quietly. Shaun stopped eating for a second and looked at desmond. "Are you insane? Maybe you're still drunk, she ran away from me! Now, that may have been your fault, but for once, I think it was my own.". He started eating again. Maybe he shouldn't have shown he even cared, "Shaun I know you, I know that thing with Kate ended badly, but that doesn't mean you should give up! In fact, you should be seizing the moment. I mean, the black haired girl last night, she was definitely interested! She was smiling and staring and I heard her talking about you to her friend."

"What did she say?" Shaun almost dropped his fork. _Oh god..._ He let it slip. Even thought desmond knew, he felt vulnerable being so open about it. "She mentioned you were the guy she'd met at the library that she liked". Desmond smirked as Shaun's jaw dropped. _She likes me!_ "Shaun, just try to talk to her. Sober this time. Now, since you got that that much , your turn to get groceries!" He threw a list and some money on the table, before clearing his plate to the sink. Shaun didn't care. She liked him. That was more than he had ever expected. He couldn't help but smile as he finished his food, and grabbed his wallet and keys. He put Desmon'ds list and money into one wallet pouch and left.

The grocery store wasn't far. And it wasn't long before Shaun was on his way home. As he passed the library, he looked up. And he saw her going in , book in hand. He could only hope that she had a reason to come back again. He reached the apartment just as Desmond opened the door. "Hey, I'm heading to Lucy's, wanna come?"  
"No , some of us work normal hours Desmond, not the night, so we need sleep." Desmond rolled his eyes "Hard to keep you happy, isn't it?" he laughed as he left. Shaun shook his head as he walked in, dropping the bags on the counmter. As he put the groceries away, he started to drift off. Thinking of her going into the library, would she disappointed that he wasn't there? Or would he ignore it? He tried to imagine how she would react. It wasn't until a can of beans fell on his left hand that he woke up, realizing it wasn't the best idea to ignore something that involved lifting of any capacity. He heard a knock. Opening the door, he saw Rebecca standing therem smirking. "What?" He asked. "Great to see you too, yes, four sugars, we need to talk" she said, walking passed him and flopping onto the couch.

He flicked the switch on the kettle. "So, to what do I owe this...never mind, what do you want?" he asked, pulling two mugs from the cupboard. "Well, last night, you made it very obvious that you're interested in the girl with the long funky hair. I want to start by saying I'm glad you've stopped fretting over Kate, it's nice to see your eye on someone who deserves it, instead of pining after her." He handed her a mug of coffee and sat next to her. "But?" He eyed her over his tea. She was looking into her mug, seemingly unsure about talking "But I hope you really are ready to try to be with her, I hope you're over Kate. I know not much happened, and I know it didn't last long but really, I know you're picky, and I know it was a tough time but, are you really ready?" She put her coffee down, and looked at him. He sipped his tea. "Well, I'll be honest, for a while, I thought it was just because she was different, but I've realized I have moved on from Kate. I don't need that b-" "Really?" Rebecca looked shocked. "Really what?" "You're over her?" "Well yes, I know I don't know this girls name, but I know she's better than Kate, she's nicer, sweeter, more intelligent, everything. She's perfect Rebecca." Shaun looked across the room, thinking about her smile. He felt his own lips curve and he heard Rebecca laugh. "It's great that you're happy, just be careful." She drained the last of her coffee. "Anyway, I have to go, it's just Tara and myself tonight, so, well, you don't wanna know." She laughed, rising from the couch. "See ya later Shaun, and remember take it easy" She waved as she walked to the door. "Thanks Rebecca, I appreciate it." She waved once more as she left. He stared at his mug. So, they approved, well Desmond and Rebecca at least. Maybe it was worth a shot.


	5. Chapter 5

I am sorry for the shortness and lack of updating, but I want to put their day in a long chapter by itself :)

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Shaun woke up a little earlier than normal the following morning. His stomach was in knots, would he see her? He took his time in the shower. This was something he was absolutely sure of. He knew he wanted to know her, wanted to see her, know about her, listen to her,_ know her name_. He stared out the window while he was making tea. _Does she like tea?_ He hoped she did. It wasn't THAT important, but it meant a little. He realized he was smiling over the idea of her liking tea. Something clicked. _I can ask her to tea!_ He smiled, it just might work.

He took his time walking to work, he was early anyway. Nothing was bad, the sky was the perfect kind of clear, the kind with occasional wispy clouds, and not too much sunlight. The air felt so _clean. _The irony was amazing given that he was in New York, but it all felt so _fresh_. As he walked into the library, he felt right. Today was going to be perfect. He stepped behind the counter, looking around. It was too early, it was only 5 to 9. He tidied the counter, a rare job. He spent half an hour just tidying, it felt nice to see the place tidy. When he was cleaning, he forgot the world around he heard a soft "ahem". "oh, sorry, I-".

It was her. Standing in front of him, looking up into his eyes, smiling that cute smile._ It was really her._ He cleared his throat. "Uh, hi" He tried to smile, he didn't know if he was actually doing so. "Hey, you weren't here when I was returning this yesterday, so I decided to wait..." her smile became more mysterious. He could feel a blush as his glasses felt hot. "That's...good, I guess" She held out the book and her hand slipped by his again. As he looked up and their eyes met, he felt time stop. And it restarted with the loud ringing of her phone. "Excuse me" she smiled as she slipped away from the counter, giving him a chance to see her today.  
She was definitely dressed for the weather. Her black tank top was loose yet clung to her in all the right places. Her shorts showed off the shape of her legs, her tights showing a floral pattern as far as her knees. Below her knees were black knee high converse. Her shape looked amazing. There was a sudden awkwardness and he blushed as she turned around, quickly averting his gaze to the book, which he restamped. He kept his head down as he walked around the counter to the shelf, putting it back in the correct spot. "So uhm..." she was right next to him. He held his breath _It's now or never._ "Willyougoferteawithme?" he blurted all of it at once, making it sound like a full word. She giggled. "Isn't it a little warm for tea? Maybe, milkshakes?" She smiled again. "Uhm, yeah, sure, yeah" he stammered out, "I have a break at 1 until 2". "Cool, I'll meet you outside" She smiled and walked off, a little spring in her step. He let out sigh and leaned back. Lunch could not come fast enough.

Shaun spent the next 3 hours glancing at the clock, begging for it to go faster. It was a slow day, so he spent it flicking through some book he didn't care about, that he wasn't even really reading. The second the hand slipped to 1, he almost jumped from his seat, holding back from running for the door. "Shaun!" he heard his boss's voice. _Oh god..._ "Shaun, it's quiet, take the rest of the day to yourself." He smiled, and walked off. _This is my lucky day..._ He strolled out the door, the sun momentarily blinding him. He looked around. _She's not here..._ would she stand him up? "Hey!" He heard a voice to his left. "I've been here a while. Is it 2 you've to be back by?" She was smiling, "Well, I just got told I have the rest of the day off, so.." her smile seemed to get wider.  
"So, we have all day together..." she let her voice drop towards the end of the sentence. He smiled "yes" She smiled again. "So, where are we going for milkshakes?" He couldn't believe talking was so _easy._ "Well, there's a place not too far from here, they're pretty nice." She started to walk ahead. "Hey, uhm, I still don't know you're name" He said, catching up with her. "It's Kayte". His breath caught.

The universe really did want to mess with his head.


	6. Chapter 6

It didn't take long to get to the milkshake place. It was a quaint little shop, a sky blue on the outside with big windows. Kayte had that cute smile on her face, _oh that smile. _She walked to the counter first, already having an order in mind apparently. "Hi, can I have a strawberry milkshake with cream please?" the cashier, a relatively young guy, seemed delighted to see her. Shaun stepped up behind her. "I'll have the same" he nodded at the cashier. "I'll pay." he said the last bit into her ear, not realizing how close they were, until she turned her head, and their noses were almost touching. "Thanks" she breathed against him, just inches from his lips. _I could kiss her. It would be so easy. _Instead, he smiled. "N-no problem" he stammered the last bit. She turned, still smiling at him, and headed for a seat. The cashier looked at him, smiling in a ways that said _nice_. Shaun simply nodded as he handed over the money and followed her. She jogged up the stairs, giving him a view he was all too happy with. She looked over her shoulder, smiling at him as he followed. She disappeared around the corner. The second floor was far more..._coupley _than the first. It was the same blue, with pink swirled lollipops spotted on the walls. The chairs were mostly pink couches with a small white coffee tables in front. She was sitting against the wall, pulling her hair back from her face and neck. Shaun felt himself tense. Why were the smallest things she did so attractive?  
He sat down next to her, trying not to make it obvious that he wanted her. He cleared his throat, trying to be discreet as he budged a tiny bit closer. "So..do you...come here often?" _Did I REALLY just say that? _She burst out laughing. It was the first time he heard her really laugh, and it was squeaky. In a very cute way. He couldn't help but laugh at her. "Did you really just use the lamest chat up line in history?" She fell back a little laughing. "Well, what else could I say?" he struggled to stop laughing at her "Perhaps 'kind madam, do you frequently aqauint this fine establishment?'" He smirked, as she continued squeaking.

"It sounds like there's a mouse being tortured up here" The cashier arrived with their milkshakes. He set them on the table, smiling at them. "Thanks Josh!" She smiled at him, that smile, _his smile. _His smile faded, maybe she was just friendly. _Maybe she didn't like me._ As the _wonderful_ Josh left, Shaun pulled over his milkshake. He put the straw in his mouth and began to drink. He had to stop. It was the best milkshake he had ever tasted. "They're good, right?" she had brought a spoon, and was putting small spoonfuls of cream in her mouth. He had to fight not to let his jaw drop. "Uh...yeah" He continued to drink, distracting himself from her. "So, how long have you been working at the library?" She smiled, shuffling a little closer to him. "Ehm, I guess about 3 or 4 years, it's a great place to work" He took another drink. "What about you? Are you working anywhere?" His glanced at her, she was still eating that cream. "Yeah, this little café in town, it's small, but it's nice. I've only been there like a year or so, but I love it" She smiled against her spoon. "Is your..." he swallowed "boyfriend happy that you work there?" he was terrified of the answer. "Actually husband, yeah he works just across the road at th-" She started laughing again.  
"I'm kidding, I'm single." she took another slip of cream.

"I guess your girlfriends happy with your job, quiet, good pay." she shrugged, but he noticed a little blush on her cheeks. He decided to try playing her at her own game. "Yeah, she loves it, I don't meet many girls so the jealousy is kept to a minimum" He took another long drink of his milkshake, looking at her out of the corner of his eye. She seemed kind of disappointed. "Not very nice, is it?" He smirked as she punched him in the shoulder. "You're so mean!" She started giggling and somehow, in a quick move, slid until she was right next to him. Their legs were pressed together. It felt nice. She was sipping her milkshake, not even talking. But it was nice. Comfortable. _Natural._ Then suddenly, she turned, her leg flat on the seat, with her foot hanging over the edge. He moved so he was in a similar pose.  
"So" She put her lips around the straw in a way that made him sweat a little "What do you do for fun?" Her silvery fringe fell down into her eye, but she ignored it. "Well, read, I go out the odd time, aside from that, nothing. Work is demanding. You?" He couldn't take his eyes off that piece of hair. "Um, kind of the same, I spend a lot of my time working, and the rest of it reading. I don't really like going out, it seems so pointless, yo-" he couldn't stop himself. He reached forward and brushed her fringe out of her eyes.

Then he realized what he was doing. And that his hand had stopped by her ear. And she had stopped talking. Moving her hair had shown her eyes properly, big, dark brown eyes, like pools of chocolate. _What was this?_ There was a cute blush rising on her cheeks as that smile he loved came back. But that was as far as he could go. He pulled his hand back. "Sorry, I just...I wanted to move that hair, it was ehh...distracting." He blushed, clearing his throat. "What were you saying?" She was a cute pink colour. She seemed shy all of a sudden. "Uh, oh uhm, yeah." She started drinking her milkshake again.  
He had rattled her.  
This, he liked.


	7. Chapter 7

Apologies for the lateness. I got myself a job and got distracted from my writing. I hope this chapter makes up for it though! :D Enjoy!

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Following her recovery from blushing, the two continued to talk. They spent well over an hour in there, discussing the smallest things. Favourite foods, animals, books, even pictures. But there was one thing that she had said that had caught Shaun's attention. Something that made his heart clench and his stomach flip.

"So, when was your first kiss?" she slipped the question out while draining some milkshake that wasn't really there. "When I was everhtin..." he faded at the last bit, trying to hide some shame. "What was that?" she smirked. He cleared his throat, feeling the blood rise in his cheeks. "When I was seventeen..." he looked away, expecting her to laugh at him like everyone else had. "I was fifteen, it was awful" she giggled, tilting her head as she remembered. "Yeah, it was like kissing a drooling dog in a washing machine." She started to laugh, falling back a little. She put on hand behind her on the couch, and looked at the cieling.

It showed off her _insatiable _curves. He licked his lips. He could barely contain the excitement rising in his stomach, as well as his trousers. His eyes moved from her lips, down her neck, stopping for a moment on her shoulders. They looked so soft and delicate...His eyes continued, slipping over the curve of her breasts to the concave shape of her waist. But the next bit was his favourite. Her hips. They were quite large for a girl of such a wais,t but they were perfect. And her legs. _Oh, her legs.._ They were far from skinny, but in a way that made him want to run his hands over them, feeling the pattern of her tights against his palms, slipping up the leg of her shorts...he shook his head to stop himself. He shouldn't be thinking of her like that. He licked his lips again, attempting to speak.

"So, I forgot to ask, how old are you?" She stayed in her position but moving her head to look straight into his eyes. "How old do you _think_ I am?" She smirked. "Uhm..." he had to try not to offend her but guess believable. About 21? Younger? 19? 18? Maybe this attraction was illegal, wrong, immoral. He decided the safest answer was twenty. He took a breath. "Twenty?" she frowned, sitting up straight and glaring at him. _Oh God, what have I done? _"You're..." she let out a breath, still frowning. "Pretty close actually, 19" she smiled, then laughed, squeaking like she had before. He let out a breath. "And I'm the mean one!" She put her hands to her mouth, trying to hide her laughter. "Stop laughing!" He poked her leg gently. She kept her hands up as she tried to stop laughing and leaned close to him, so close that their noses were almost touching. She put her hands on her leg, her fingertips brushing his leg as she moved. She looked into his eyes as if she was looking for a secret he was hiding from her. She licked her lips as she parted them slightly. "Make me...".

There was no laughter, no giggling. Just tension, sweet, arousing, lip trembling tension. It sounded like she was begging for passion, begging to be kissed with every ounce of emotion in his body, to be pinned down, carressed, tugged, scratched. As if she was _craving_ him the way he craved her. He dropped every fear, and started to lean forward, the palm of his right hand came in contact with the tights he craved to touch for so long. His lips parted, he could almost feel static pass between them. He paused for a second to lick his lips lightly. Finally. This was what he had been waiting for. Her hands rested on his forearms. Her eyes started to close as she took a breath. _She wanted this. _He knew it. His eyes slipped to her lips, they were slightly parted and looked so soft. They slid into a smirk.

"Just..." she seemed breathless. "Just kiss me already..." Her hands slid up to his shoulders and she gently tugged him towards her. His eyes closed. This was what he wanted since the second he laid eyes on her. Butterflies beat against the inside of his stomach, his head was a mess, he could hear his heart beating. Then something broke that sound. "Uhm, we're closing guys.", Josh was standing at the top of the stairs, and he didn't look impressed. His jaw looked tight. Shaun felt his own jaw clench. Until he heard her. "Okay" he looked back to her as he hands slid down his forearms and she stood up, smiling at Josh. But not _that_ smile. A rigid, irritated one. But Josh just smiled at her.

"Come on Shaun" She held her hand out as she went ahead of him, her perfectly rounded backside was in his face and he felt his trousers tighten just a little. He took her hand, standing up while slipping his bag on. She walked ahead, giving him _his _smile and looking back ahead. Her hair made a small _swish_ as it moved. He stared at it, smiling. He looked ahead and saw Josh glaring his way once again. He lowered his gaze, half proud of the fact that this guy seemed to hate him for being close to her. As they got outside, he could't help but ask.

"What's his problem?" his eyes flicked to Josh, who was still frowning. "Who, Josh?" she looked kind of worried for a moment. "Well, he asked me out a while back. Nothing serious. Just a date. But I said no." she looked kind of guilty. "We'd been friends beforehand, but since it's been kind of awkward. I'm just..." she sighed, looking for the word. "I'm not looking for a relationship you know."

His heart sank. He felt sick to his stomach. And it must have shown, because a worried look crossed her face. "Are you okay Shaun?" He blinked a couple of times. _No, not even close, I'm pretty sure this is worse than..._ "Yeah, sorry, just...zoned out a little." He forced a smile, despite the feeling in his stomach. "Are you sure..?" She looked worried. "Yeah" he held the smile. _No._ The word repeated in his head, over and over. He was not okay. "Uhm, I'm gonna head home. I'm kind of tired." She looked disappointed, and it seemed accidental when she pouted just a little. "Can I...walk you?" she asked quietly, not wanting to leave him seemingly. He shrugged, walking ahead. His apartment wasn't too far from here, at least it wouldn't take long. It was a silent walk She glanced up at him every so often, when she thought he wasn't paying attention. But while his mind was far away, he was paying enough attention to know. He felt lost, heartbroken. He had no chance whatsoever.

As they reached his apartment building, he realized something. Even thought it had hurt, he still didn't want to be away from her. "Erm, would you like to come in?" She looked a little shocked, but smiled. "Sure!" The apartment was high up, and the elevator was out of order. He sighed as he realized the climb before him. "It's on the fourth floor, I hope you don't mind stairs." She smirked, "Not at all." it was a slow climb, Shaun leading the way. He couldn't help but be disappointed that he didn't have the same view he experienced had been in the milkshake shop stairs. He almost walked passed the door while remembering that view. "Excuse the mess, if there is one" He opened the door slowly, peeking in to see that Desmond was not doing something excessively embarrassing for both of them the one time he had chosen to bring someone over. The coast seemed clear, so he led her into the small apartment. She looked around, her hands by her sides, her smile never fading. "It's pretty awesome" she looked at him as she said it. _Why are you doing this to me..._ He couldn't hold back the questions any more. "If you don't want a relationship, why did you ask me to kiss you?".

Her expression changed. Her brow furrowed as she opened her mouth to answer.

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SUSPENSE! I hope you loved it, hopefully the next one will be up soon :)


	8. Chapter 8

As always, I apologize for the wait, work makes this stuff IMPOSSIBLE. So anyway, sorry also, about the shortness, it's appropriate. I hope you love it :D

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"That's different."  
_That's different?!_ That was all she could muster to defend herself?! He felt his jaw drop."Different?! That's your response?! How is that different?! Were you going to kiss me then tell me all this?! Had you even bothered to think of how that could turn out? Is it often you go around kissing guys then telling them you're not interested in relationships?!" He couldn't contain the hurt any more. She had led him on. Without batting an eyelid. "Since when does a kiss even have to mean anything?" She was shocked, but irritated, her voice rose slightly. Everything stopped. He sat there, begging to be kissed, while she willed the same, only to hear that it wouldn't mean anything. "You were going to kiss me, and let it mean _nothing_?" he breathed, looking her straight in the eye. "Well why would it? We barely know each other." The words went through him like knives. _I meant nothing at all to her..._ "I mean so little to you?" he was holding back both anger and sadness. This hurt. A lot. More than anything. More than Kate... "You're a friend Shaun, but it's not like we're in some love story. Kisses mean absolutely nothing, nine times out of ten." she shrugged. He felt every part of his body sear as if it were engulfed in flames. He never thought he was enough for her, but _this..._he knew the couldn't even be friends after this. They couldn't. It would kill him. "Maybe you should go." he felt his nails digging into the palms of his hands, his fists were clenched. "What?" it was her turn to show some surprise.  
"We both want different things and have very different ideas. I don't want to deal with them right now. Please, go." he looked at the floor beneath him. He finally has the chance to even be around her and this is the result. More pain that he had ever felt. A feeling of loss, anger, despair...He could feel her eyes on him. "No." He glanced up. She was standing, rooted to the spot, an expression on her face that he couldn't quite read. "Why are you doing this to me Kayte? Have I not showed you enough of what I feel?" His teeth clenched as his fists balled even tighter than before. "What you feel? All I've established is that you're upset over my not wanting a relationship. Do you really have an ego large enough to just _assume_ I would even want to be with you without even knowing you?" She seemed as angry as he was now. "I don't even need an ego to see that you're nothing but selfish, you act like this sweet, innocent little girl without a care in the world, yet following begging a man to kiss you, you retreat and say you don't want anything of a relationship with him." He felt himself shaking. "You're nothing but a pretentious slut!"  
The words slipped over his lips before he could catch them, but he didn't regret it. Her reaction made him smile with sickening satisfaction. Her face dropped, tears formed in her eyes and her whole body seemed to droop. She was hurt. He hated the thought, but he also loved it, she had brought him to his knees with hurt, she should feel the same. "How could you say that...?" the tears were slipping down her cheeks. "How? You ask me _how?!_ You flirt constantly, flaunt yourself and then beg, not even ask,_ beg_ me to kiss you, yet you want nothing of a constant with me? What else could that be Kayte, please, enlighten me." he had stopped shaking, his eyes felt heavy, the anger was there, just under the surface, ready at any second to burst out of his skin, taking his heart with it. "I thought you were different." He couldn't help but laugh at her words. "Could you pick something a little bit more original maybe? Instead of spouting crap and acting like I'm the bad guy. You're the one who led me on." her face changed in an instant, becoming dark, angry. "How the fuck did I even lead you on Shaun?! An attempt at a kiss means nothing! Not a damn thing! To anyone!" She was shouting, her voice bouncing from the walls.  
It was the straw that broke the Brit's back.  
"So flirting and trying to kiss someone isn't leading them on? Please, tell me more of your fucked up views on life! Is the sky actually purple and pigs really do fly?!" He found his own voice echoing back at him. "Oh, you're so fucking annoying! You think you're so intelligent, so perfect in your own fucking world, well guess what Hastings, you're fucking not! You're sarcasm is annoying, your self-righteous attitude makes me sick, and your confidence in your ability to get a girl is down-right stupid!" tears were running down her face, and threatened his own eyes. "Then why did you bother trying to know me? Are you stupid or just like trying to mount anything you can get away with?" His jaw hurt from being clenched, his palms hurt from his nails digging into them and his eyes hurt from holding back tears. "Because I like you, you fucking moron!" and with that, he felt her weight against him, her arms around his neck, her lips crashing into his.


	9. Chapter 9

I am so sorry for how long took look, I have a full time job and so much to do that I can only write when I have spare time or when travelling. I'm uploading this while waiting another connecting train! So, I hope you enjoy, I think the next chapter will be the last, please review with your comments on what's good/bad/ugly. Terrible joke, but I'm not funny anyway. Enjoy!

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For a moment, Shaun couldn't react. He had no idea how to. Then he realised what was happening. She was finally showing interest. As good a time as any to show her what she had been missing out on earlier.

Gasping her hips, Shaun forced her back against the wall behind her, and moved his hands to hers. He paused to breath, pulling her hands above her head and moving his lips across her cheek and down her neck. He heard her let out a small gasp, making him smirk. She let out another, accompanied by a slight moan as he bit down lightly. She finally started to struggle against his hands and being distracted by the growing tightness in his pants, she slipped free, grabbing his collar and managing to turn him so she was now forcing him against the wall. He pushed his glasses up his nose, breathing hard. She smirked, she knew what she was doing. Standing on her toes, she pressed her lips to his neck as her hands pulled his shirt from his trousers and slipped up over his belly, gently scratching him. The feeling made him involuntarily hiss through his teeth as he tilted his head back against the wall.  
He decided he wasn't going to wait any longer.  
Grabbing her right hand, he began pulling her towards his room. This was a first for him, but all nerves were forgotten. He wanted her and she wanted him, it was that simple.

She didn't even try to resist following him to his room. Her breathing was as hard as his, her cheeks flushed. Shaun was finding hard to just throw her onto the couch then and there but he knew Desmond could come home at any time. As he reached the door, he took a deep breath, the butterflies were threatening to come from their cocoons inside his belly. But he wasn't nervous. For the first time since he'd seen her, he wasn't nervous. He was excited, he had dreamed of this moment. "I'm not going to fuck this up now" the words slipped in and out of his mind as he pushed the door open and let her walk in passed him.

He couldn't help but be thankful that he had dressed the bed this morning, but all thoughts left his head as she turned to look at him. She looked perfect. As his mouth opened to tell her, she stepped forward, wrapping her arms around his neck. His hands slipped around her waist and pressed his forehead to hers. He began to move towards the bed, she let her hands slide to his as she sat on the edge of his bed. He took that as a "yes".

Placing his knees at either side of hers, he pushed her hands above her head once again and went back to the lips he'd missed so much. His left hand moved to cup her cheek and slide into her soft hair as his face moved to her neck once again, nuzzling and nipping, making her giggle. She turned her head and their noses met.

They stopped and just looked into each others eyes.

At that moment, Shaun realised he wanted to spend the rest of his life looking into those eyes. He could see every tiny detail of her from here. The freckles sprinkled across her nose, the darker brown that circled her milk chocolate coloured irises, her long eye lashes.  
Even the small things that could be viewed negatively were beautiful to him, the dark circles under her eyes, the way one eye seemed a little squinted by comparison to the other. She was perfect to him, everything about her, he could never hope to change anything. Except her last name, of course.  
"You look-"

"SHAUN!" The door banged loudly. Desmond. Shaun let out a loud sigh. "Not now, Desmond!"  
"But I brought food! "  
Shaun raised his right hand and pinched the bridge of his nose as Kayte giggled underneath him.  
"Excuse me for a few minutes".  
Planting a soft kiss on her lips, he moved himself room the bed, moving towards the door. He ran his fingers through his hair, wondering how to explain this to Desmond. As he left, he saw her sitting up and looking around.  
"I brought-" Desmond stopped as he saw Shaun's current state. His shirt was untucked and messy, his short hair was standing on end and his glasses were askew.  
"Shaun...what happened?"  
Shaun shook his head at Desmond's blank expression.  
"I'll give you three guesses Desmond, actually I won't, you'll get it wrong" Desmond tilted his head.  
"Shaun did I interrupt you ma-"  
"no Desmond, I've a girl over and I'd appreciate it if you'd leave us alone for a little while." Shaun hissed glancing back at his door, checking that it was closed.  
Desmond smirked. "Can I meet her?" "No you cannot! Now bugger off!" Desmond was going nowhere. "Why? Is she ugly?" "No! For the love of-"

"Hey Shaun?" Kayte was leaning against the doorframe, smoothing her hair. "Uhm, yes?" He felt his cheeks glow bright red as Desmond's mouth opened slightly. "I have to head off, emergency at work" she shrugged. "Oh, okay." He could hear himself whining. "Can I come back later?" She smiled as she walked over to him. Shaun felt his jaw drop a little and he shook his head a little to get himself together. "Sure" she was right next to him. "Cool, see you around 8ish" she smiled, perching herself on her toes and kissing him before walking away, "bye" she waved as they watched her walking to the door. "Bye Kayte" Shaun said, as the door closed.  
Desmond seemed too stunned to talk. A few moments passed. "Yeah, I'm so ashamed because she's obviously ugly." Shaun muttered. "How did you hide her?! And when did that happen?!" Desmond laughed, clearly delighted for his friend. "Today, and since she said she'd come back later, I hope you intend on leaving me alone for that time. " "obviously! Now, tell me everything over food."

Desmond nodded as Shaun finished his explanation. "So...she's coming back?" Shaun nodded. "And staying?" He nodded again. "Nice one, Shaun!" Desmond clapped his right hand onto Shaun's shoulder. "Do you think I should make dinner or something for her? Maybe tea..." Shaun was at a loss, he didn't even know what she liked and didn't like food wise. "Why not take the simple approach? Make her tea and a sandwich?" Desmond shrugged. "But who knows what she likes in them?" Shaun shook his head. "You could just ask her..." Desmond looked at Shaun as if this were the most obvious factor to consider. "I hate saying it Desmond, but you might be right." He glanced at the clock. 6.30. Eating had wasted more time than he thought.  
"Should I...change or something?" Shaun asked nervously, unsure of how he was revealing so much to Desmond. "Nah, fix your shirt though, you can't do the walk of shame when you haven't even done anything yet." Desmond laughed. "But really, I'm happy for you. I know how much you like her." Shaun nodded, thankful his friend understood. "I'll get out of your hair, there's candles in the drawer from the last blackout, some scented ones, in case you're looking to get the mood going." Shaun rolled his eyes at Desmond's less than subtle comment, mostly for effect. He wanted this evening to be perfect, and that might help.

Desmond left soon after, patting Shaun on the shoulder and exclaiming how "proud" he was that Shaun was "leaving the nest". Shaun's retort was less than kind. He let out a loud sigh as he shut the door. The butterflies in his stomach had finally lurched free and were fluttering wildly. This was the most unsure he had ever been about anything, ever. But he knew his efforts would be appreciated. He tidied around the room, making sure all food wrappers and plates were gone in their respective places and the floor wasn't the slightest bit dusty.  
He moved to the bathroom, it was certainly a men's one, the seat up, the toilet paper not on the holder, bottles, both empty and at least partly filled, littering the room. He sighed as he looked at the task before him. He pulled in the bin from the kitchen and started chucking in every empty bottle and toilet paper roll he could find. It ended up only taking a few minutes. He glanced around the main parts of their apartment and nodded his approval. But his biggest task still lay before him.  
He walked to his own bedroom, glancing around at the now messy bed. He straightened the duvet, making sure it was as neat as possible and collected the various litter in the room. It was tidy, but he felt the need to question everything. _  
"Is the duvet clean? Should I change it? What about the pillow covers? The curtains? Oh, don't be silly._" The questions plagued his mind but he knew there wasn't much more he could do. He walked back into the living room and glanced at the clock.  
7.30.

He drew a deep breath as he peeked into the drawer Desmond had mentioned. He hadn't lied, there were a lot of scented candles, in a VERY wide variety. He chose vanilla, simple but his favourite. He lit two and dimmed the lights. He chuckled as he clicked the switch on the kettle. The scene was so cliche. As he put sugar in his cup, he glanced back at the clock.  
7.50  
Shaun felt that the butterflies had turned to worms with wings, only serving to make the situation more uncomfortable than before.  
He sat on the couch with his tea, taking his time, glancing at the clock every few moments.  
7.53

7.56

7.57

7.58

"_Do I look okay?_"

7.59

"_What if she changed her mind?"  
"What if she doesn't like me anymore_?"

8.00

"_What if work was just an excuse?_"

8.01

"_She said 8ish, right..._"

8.05

"_Maybe she's just running late_."

8.10

"_Stuck in traffic?_"

8.13

"_Dealing with customers?_"

8.17

"_Dropped home for something_?"

8.20

"_She wouldn't stand me up.._"

8.25

"_Would she?_"

8.30

"_No, she's not like that, she's just late._"

8.43

"_Just late.._."

8.54

"_Shaun, let it go..._"

8.55

"_Stop fooling yourself.._"

8.56

"_Why would she like me anyway?_"

8.57

"_She's too good for you._"

8.58

"_She doesn't care, she can have any guy she wants._"

8.59

"_Don't cry, you were expecting this_"

9.00

"_You knew it was too good to be true.._"

9.01

"_She's not coming, Shaun._"

He let out a sigh, letting the feeling in his chest take over. It was like a tightness, like his heart had been smothered. It hurt to feel this again. But it was worse this time. He blinked as a few tears slipped down his cheek.

She had stood him up.


End file.
